Thursday, March 15, 2007

I have heard people rant and rave and bellow

I had another post in mind, but I really have to comment on the Scarlett Johansson stuff.

I'm always happy when any theater topic makes the cover of any paper other than The Stage, so I am thrilled news related to a revival of South Pacific was on the cover of The Post today. But I question the news itself.

Let's look at the story inside. It says that "Johansson is in the running to play Nellie Forbush." What does "in the running" mean? Is Bartlett Sher lining up random girls and making them sprint for the role? Is Johansson fourth slot over on the track sporting number 2 in honor of her character in The Island? I really don't get it because, let's face it, if Scarlett Johansson wanted to do it, she could just do it. She's not up against other people really. Sure, the Weisslers might turn down Tara O'Connor going into Chicago because she wasn't good, but if Scarlett Johansson wanted to stand onstage at the Ambassador and do nothing, they'd change the musical so she could.

Michael (who I do like) says later on in his story "Reese Witherspoon and Kelli O'Hara are also on Lincoln Center's wish list." (I'm ignoring the fact that O'Hara would be on a wish list with these other people as it is out of the scope of this post, but, trust me, I did chuckle at it.) So, basically, now he's saying Scarlett is just on a random wish list with these other people. Let me tell you, I've written a musical about a girl who works as a theater journalist and is also a slurpee and TV junkie and Kirsten Dunst is in on my wish list to play the lead. In addition to her, there is Madonna, just cause. I've even thrown in Halle Berry on the list because I think she might sell tickets. Maybe I'll email Variety and see if they want to cover it. Oh, wait! I can write my own big story about it! I can pitch it to People. That's so on my list of things to do tomorrow. That and purchasing a Pina Colada Slurpee.

Listen, I'm not saying we won't see Scarlett up there at the Beaumont. I think it's unlikely, but, stranger things have happened. She is indeed a musical fan, I've heard that from many people. But that's not the point. I still question reporting anything like this without being able to say "negotiations," "talks" or something of the sort.

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