Thursday, August 16, 2007

Luck Be a Lady, er, an Antionette, er... whatever

I realized after I read back my Sunday night blog post that it was entirely too long. I'm sorry. Though as I figured, already there is a new new play on the horizon, something unpromisingly titled August: Osage County out of Chicago that is apparently quite promising indeed, or at least Charles Isherwood would have us think so. Now, he thought Thom Pain was promising and he thought Spelling Bee was comparable to A Chorus Line. But, it sounds like something and it's about a mean and crazy mother and those kinds of plays for some reason attract an audience. Remember Beauty Queen? That fat slob in her pink bathrobe on the sides of buses, I don't know why, but that sold tickets.

Anyway, I've decided to try and make this post shorter, because I know you have lives and I had my eyes checked today and my pupils are a little dilated still. I am going to try and name the five nominees for all the acting categories for next year's Tonys - featured, too. THIS can be especially fun to look back on, to see all the promising ideas that when realized - or not so realized - fizzled like those Pop Rocks that allegedly killed Mikey of Mikey Likes It fame when he mixed them with soda. Now THAT would make a good Fringe show, the story of Mikey from those Life cereal commercials, THAT would be a hit. I'm enjoying caps-for-emphasis tonight. Caps-for-emphasis, now THAT'S fun. Now that's FUN. NOW, that's fun. No, that last one doesn't work.

(*) Denotes predicted winners


*Morgan Freeman, The Country Girl

-Kevin Kline, Cyrano de Bergerac

-Jefferson Mays, Pygmalion - Kline and Mays do battle again!!!!! This is huge!!!!!

-Someone with an accent, Les Liaisons Dangereuses

-Rufus Sewell, Rock N Roll

No, I don't think Harry Potter's going to get the nod if Equus comes. And I don't think Richard Griffiths will either. He has a big belly though!


-Annette Bening, The Female of the Species

-Laura Linney (?), Les Liaisons Dangereuses

*A Chicago Actress, August: Osage County

-Frances McDormand, The Country Girl

-S. Epatha Merkerson, Come Back, Little Sheba

at last, Best Actress in a Play will be a race again! I think it's between A Chicago Actress and Sepatha. I bet the Chicago actress beats all the Hollywood glamour pusses. Wait, I'm just picturing Frances McDormand accepting her Oscar for Fargo with no make-up on. Ah, the glamour. Poor Annette Bening, she can't even win a Tony! Maybe Rosie Perez will sneak in here. She's fun. And Rita Moreno won the Tony with that part. Featured, but she won.

BEST ACTOR - Musical

-Roger Bart, Young Frankenstein

-Daniel Evans, Sunday in the Park with George

*Brian Stokes Mitchell, South Pacific - Don't you think it's just gonna be him? I'm already asleep.

-Sky Masterson, Guys and Dolls

-Lin-Manuel Miranda, In the Heights


-Kelli O'Hara, South Pacific - And I mean, come on, it's gonna be her, let's just all face the boring facts.

-Boring English Girl whose name I refuse to remember because she's so boring and I'm not going anyway because this was the one time that Bernadette actually WAS amazing (more fun with caps lock), Sunday in the Park With George

-Miss Adelaide I'm assuming Jane Krakowski, Guys and Dolls

-Sutton Foster, Young Frankenstein - This gal's great, she's got a Tony nod every two years since 2002, and I love calling her a gal.

-Megan Mullally, Young Frankenstein

I think Kerry Butler might be remembered, but she's a long shot. This might actually be a competitive category, with the Sarah Brown from Guys and Dolls and The Little Mermaid though she won't be nominated and Faith Prince. Remember how good Faith Prince used to be? What happened? Does anyone know?


-Raul Esparza, The Homecoming - I'm laughing just typing this!

-Schlubbola #5, Come Back, Little Sheba

-A Chicago actor, August: Osage County

-Someone from Stalag 17 which I can't imagine will happen but..., Stalag 17

*Jim Norton, The Seafarer - Is he in it? I think he is. He must be. God, that play is gonna zzzzzzzzzzz.


Some Frump, Top Girls

*Some Other Frump, Top Girls

Another Frump but this one is from Chicago, August: Osage County

Martha Plimpton, Cymbeline

Mary Louise Burke, Is He Dead?

Not sure where this category's going at all, but I took a stab at it. And I'm happy as always to promote Martha Plimpton. And Mary Louise Burke, for that matter. She's a genius.


-Some kid, 13

-Someone in In the Heights, In the Heights

*Harvey Fierstein, A Catered Affair - A Fifth Tony! In a Fifth Category! Watch out Tommy Tune, you're goin' down!

-Shuler Hensley, Young Frankenstein - not to get too serious, but I assume they'll juggle categories with these people and I feel like he might get bumped down. Or he might stay up above the title and someone like Christopher Fitzgerald will be in this spot, but someone will be in this spot from this show.

-Some cute boy with a pretty voice, South Pacific


-Leslie Kritzer, A Catered Affair

-Priscilla Lopez, In the Heights

-Andrea Martin, Young Frankenstein

*Some girl kid, 13 - remember Daisy Eagan? OK, no jokes please.

-Sherie Rene Scott, The Little Mermaid

And I didn't even mention the Bloody Mary! You know SHE'S gonna find a way in here!

Final fun with caps lock, end of post. See you in May!

Sorry, this one was long too...


Seth Christenfeld said...

Mary Louise Burke, Is He Dead?

No, Mary Louise Burke is alive. And a she.

*rimshot* said...

Thanks for posting this bold effort to see into the future. I gotta hand it to you--you've got a great handle on who and what it headed to B'way in the coming year. I look forward to seeing how your predictions fare. I posted a link to your forecast on my site.